The Streetsblog Carolers in Concert: Live at Gracie Mansion

We’re back!

The Streetsblog Carolers returned for their annual tradition, now in its second year, of belting out mirthful street-safety satires at Gracie Mansion on Tuesday night. With Mayor de Blasio on hand (albeit inside where it was warm), the team of Streetsbloggers Dave Colon Julianne Cuba and Gersh Kuntzman were joined by returning carolers Melodie Bryant, Jessame Hannus, Leslie Merlin, Reed Rubey and Angela Stach to perform some instant classics (under the musical direction of Ric Becker, as always).

All the videos and lyrics are below.

So give a listen and read along. Yule be so excited.

My Most-Hated Things

Cops busting women who sell gum and churros
High ranking cops who are stubborn like burros
Squad cars in bike lanes lined up in a string
These are a few of my most-hated things

Filthy rich neighbors with blue in their blood veins
Suing the city to stop safety bike lanes
People who fear what more biking can bring
They are a few of my most-hated things

When I’m angry
Or feel let down
Or I pay my tax
I simply remember my most-hated things
And blame the elected hacks.

Governor Cuomo berates Andy Byford
Albany game-playing more dumb than absurd
Riders just want better transit that zings
These are a few of my most hated things.

All of the students walking to their classes
Are dodging drivers emitting those gases
Kids should not worry about anything
But to be safe they would need to wear wings

When I’m angry
Or I’m let down
By this City Hall
I simply remember my most-hated things
And once again feel … appalled.

Corey Johnson’s Master Plan

Corey Johnson’s Master Plan
Will make our streets safer
The mayor says that he’s on board
Or, wait, did we mishear?
Breaking the car culture, he says that he wants
If you want to drive, you should move to Larchmont

And while we are building
More glorious car-free zones
Walk as you please, there’s no need for unease
And we’ll finally reduce broken bones.
Walk as you please, there’s no need for unease
And we’ll finally reduce broken bones.

Oh, Corey Johnson has a plan
To make roadways calmer
Fewer crashes mean that we can fire the embalmer
We can fix our city and make it all grand
Put away the shovels and mournful armbands.

And while we are building
More glorious car-free zones
Walk as you please, there’s no need for unease
And we’ll finally reduce broken bones.
Walk as you please, there’s no need for unease
And we’ll finally reduce broken bones.

Will de Blasio Keep Us Safe This Christmas?

Will de Blasio keep us safe this Christmas?
Sidewalks jammed and packed
Tourists line up to see the tree
Crammed in anxiously
A total car ban he should now enact.

Why is driving allowed at Christmas?
Take the Brooklyn Bridge
Six lanes are for motorists
While pedestrians are pissed
Move it over a smidge?

It’s another depressing time of Christmas
Thanks to our mayor
Out of towners are left in shock
Walking through gridlock
Getting around should not require prayers.

Why is driving allowed at Christmas?
Take the Brooklyn Bridge
Six lanes are for motorists
While pedestrians are pissed
Move it over a smidge?

Let Him Go

Oh, Commiss’ner O’Neill’s retiring
And kind words, he ain’t inspiring
We have no real praise to bestow.
Let him go, let him go, let him go.

There’s simply no way to abide
Ticketing bikers after one has died
The mayor never told him no
Let him go, let him go, let him go.

If he really had done his job
Cars would have been a central mission
But his cops are a reckless mob
It’s not like it’s nuclear fission.

So, Commish’ner O’Neill, please leave us
You did little more than aggrieve us
Your successes we just don’t know.
Let him go, let him go, let him go.
LET HIM GO, LET HIM GO, LET HIM GO!

The Busway Works

Riding on a bus
(In the) city of New York
(Would) always make you cuss
Or scream like Mickey Roarke.

But now on 14th Street
The buses must come first
And the cars must stay away
At last things are reversed!

The busway works
Busway works
(The) busway is a hit!
Oh what fun to know that
Arthur Schwartz is eating shit.

(The) busway’s great
Busway’s great
(The) busway we adore!
There’s no better way crosstown
Please give us many more.

There was a courtroom fight
Some Villagers had jeered
Said cars would be a blight
On streets that they lived near
But they were very wrong
Side streets are just fine
Cars have moved along
Their suit is a punchline.

The busway works
Busway works
(The) busway is a hit!
Oh what fun to know that
Arthur Schwartz is eating shit.

(The) busway’s great
Busway’s great
(The) busway we adore!
There’s no bet-ter way crosstown
Please give us many more!

The busway works
Busway works
(The) busway is a hit!
Oh what fun to know that
Arthur Schwartz is eating shit.

(The) busway’s great
Busway’s great
(The) busway we adore!
There’s no bet-ter way crosstown
Please give us many more!